Go with Your Gut

Blog Post 31 Instincts Scott McLeod

Photo courtesy of Scott McLeod and www.flickr.com

If you have even one little shred of doubt about your marriage, don’t go through with the adoption.

—Paraphrased from Raymond “Red” Reddington, The Blacklist

I’m a huge fan of The Blacklist.  The plot grips me.  The characters are deep, and they truly struggle.  There’s also lots of one-liners that can come out, some that may make you laugh, others that make you think.  The one above comes from one of the main characters.  Like him or hate him, Red can dispense some great wisdom.  With this quote, he warns Liz Keen, the leading lady, that he sees things in her marriage that she either doesn’t see or denies.  In essence he’s telling her to listen to her instincts, to what her gut is saying about her marriage.

How many times have you ignored your gut instinct?  I certainly have at times.  I may have had doubts about something or someone.  Then I ignored what my instincts were trying to tell me and paid the price.

Fortunately, I’ve also listened to my instincts at critical times.

One incident comes to mind.  I was a sophomore in college and accepted an invitation to a fraternity formal in the mountains about two hours away from my college.  We were staying with my college roommate’s parents.  Things started out great.  We had a good time at supper.  The dancing was fun too, save for one thing.  My date got drunk.  My gut was saying that if I didn’t drive us home, we might wind up a wet spot on the side of a mountain or at the bottom of a ravine.  I drove home.  Thank goodness I knew how to drive a manual-drive car! To this day, I know I made a good call.

After reading several of my posts, you may think that this is where I provide steps to accomplish this task of listening to your instincts.  I’m not.  Instead, I urge you all, especially you ladies out there, to reprogram yourself to listen to your instincts.  I believe that in today’s society, we’ve programmed our children think that in certain situations, it’s okay to ignore instincts.  For the ladies out there, we’ve inadvertently taught our girls, especially southern girls, that it’s a no-no to be impolite to anyone.

Not true.  I’m not saying that we have a right to be rude to anyone we please.  Not at all.  What I’m saying is that if you meet someone and your instincts are saying that something’s not right, then back away and remove yourself from situation.  Check out Gaven de Becker’s The Gift of Fear for a good read about this.

Listening to instincts goes far beyond dangerous situations.  It extends into every major decision you’ll make and even some minor ones.  If you have some misgivings about a job that you may not be able to explain, don’t take it.  If you have the slightest bit of hesitation about accepting a marriage proposal, maybe it’s better to wait a bit.  If you have any misgivings about marrying someone, it might be better to call it off.  Losing a deposit on a reception hall is better than winding up in a miserable marriage or in front of a judge during a divorce.

Listen to that God-given voice that speaks from deep within you.  I promise it won’t steer you wrong.

As for Liz Keen, did she take Red’s advice?  She did.  She stopped the adoption process.  And though I’m not all the way through the Season 1 DVDs, I’ve seen enough to know one thing.  Something isn’t right in her marriage.

I have not received any compensation for writing this post.  I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services I have mentioned.  I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR Part 255: Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

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